FINALLY.

Hey Friends!

So, it’s been a bit (like since June) since my last blog, but we’ve been a tad busy J.  Last I wrote to you, I was asking you to pray that our finder interview would go well at the US Embassy in Addis.  The following morning, at VBS, I was watching the clock, checking my phone every few minutes.  Nine thirty rolled around, and I resigned myself to the fact that we wouldn’t be hearing our coveted news that morning.  Then my phone rang.

We cleared Embassy!!!! Thank you, Jesus.  Within a few hours, our plane tickets were booked, and we were all set to head out on June 27.  After years and months of waiting, and hope after hope being crushed, something had finally gone the way we had wanted.  Honestly, I was stunned.  I think I had begun to believe that “His ways are not our ways…” meant that we never are blessed with that for which we have asked.  This huge “Yes!” to our prayers floored me.  I was going to get my girl.

We packed as quickly as possible and prayed we had everything that we could possibly need.  Let me just tell you, this was a ridiculously difficult task.  Packing for a week in Ethiopia for yourself, your husband, and a baby you really don’t know, and preparing for a 17 hour flight home with said child is just plain overwhelming.  Amazingly, we got it all done and only managed to forget a few essentials- which, by the way, somehow were less essential when we finally had our baby in our arms.

A huge blessing on this trip was that we were able to travel there and back with some wonderful friends we met on our second trip.  We arrived in Addis with our friends, the Smiths, and headed to the guesthouse where we would be staying.  Although we were filthy dirty after flying for what seemed like days and days (actually 2 days), we loaded up the bus and began the trek across the city to the transition home where our girls lived.  Who has time for a shower when you haven’t seen your baby for months?!  (I was thankful for the dry shampoo my sister had given me before we left- even if it did explode ALL over the bathroomJ).

As we pulled up to the transition home, my heart began pounding in my chest.  Could this really be happening?!  Was I here to bring my child home?!  We went inside and waited eagerly for the nannies to bring us Ellie. 

And then, after what seemed like an eternity apart, we were together.  She was ours, and we were hers.  Forever. 

She was a little overwhelmed and shed a few tears when we were first reunited, but it didn’t take her too long to warm back up to us.  We greeted several kiddos who remembered us by name from the previous trip, and said a few tearful good-byes to the precious women who had cared for our children.  These ladies give their lives to care for the fatherless, and they watch as countless children leave them to go to the United States with their new families.  They are so happy for the children, but the pain in their eyes reveals their heartache as they must say good-bye.  I am forever grateful to these women for the love and care they selflessly gave both Ellie and Addie.  “Thank you” is nowhere close to being an adequate expression of my gratitude. 

After good-byes, we headed back to the guesthouse to begin our new life together.   As we drove back across the town, Ellie slept in my arms- no, car seats are not considered essential or even slightly necessary in Ethiopia- and I just stared at her in wonder.  How was this finally happening?

We spent the next several days at the guesthouse, without power, and tried to pass the time as best we could.  We were told that we could not leave the guesthouse with Ellie, so we stayed there most of the trip.  One afternoon we went to the market and to the Sheraton to eat dinner, and left Ellie at the guesthouse with a nanny.  Another day, we went to Woudneh’s new home for lunch.  What a privilege to be welcomed into his home and to listen to the incredible stories of his amazing life!  West Sands and Lifeline are so blessed to be able to trust that their children are in this man’s hands.

The one time we were able to take Ellie Claire out with us was when we went to the Embassy.  I wish I had some grand story of our experience there, but it was so uneventful and un-ceremonial and quick that I barely remember it.  We walked up to a window, answered a handful of questions, and were on our way.

We waited a day or two for Ellie’s visa, and then the long awaited day came.  It was time to go home.  We piled our bags into the van and prepared to leave.  Then, it happened- my most stellar mommy moment ever- All the bags were loaded, and I headed out to the van, thinking, “Shoo, can’t believe we’re finally leaving.  Hmm… seems like I’m forgetting something." ….....“Billy!  Where’s Ellie?!”  I ran back inside to find my girl lying on a mat on the floor, looking around like, “Ummmm Helloooo?” The folks inside just laughed as I scooped her up and ran out again, assuring her that of course, I didn’t forget her. J

The trip to the airport was one of the most bittersweet moments of my life.  I stared out the windows trying to etch pictures of Ethiopia into my memory.  I was overwhelmed with joy that I was finally bringing my daughter home, but saddened to be taking her from this country that I had grown to love.   I was also overcome with grief as I sobbed to Billy, “She’s somewhere out there, …and I’m just leaving her.” 

Addie.

She’s there.  I’m not. 

One year ago today, Billy and I boarded a plane to Ethiopia for the first time.  As I consider all that has happened since, I am somewhat paralyzed by the various emotions that flood my heart.  I do not understand every reason why Addie was a part of our journey, but I am thankful that she was.  I am thankful that even if it was only for two short months, I was legally her mother.  I ache when I consider what we know of her current situation, and then ache even more when I realize how little we know or will ever know about where she is. 

I allowed myself just a moment to grieve that day- just a moment, because this day was supposed to be about joy.  This day was about getting on a plane and going home so that two of my girls could be together- so that our family could be together.

We got on board the plane and settled in for what was to be a loooooong flight.  The Smith’s and I sat in one row with the girls in bassinets, and Billy sat behind us.  Between the four of us, we managed to keep the babies happy for most of the trip.  As we finally touched down on US soil, I felt my whole body release a deep sigh of relief.  She was home.  We were home.

We went through customs and immigration, and on July 4^th, 2013, our country’s birthday, Elloree Claire Yetnayet Baker became a citizen of the United States of America.   Glory, glory, hallelujah!

We waited for a flight from DC to Charlotte, and then flew from Charlotte to Louisville.  Ellie did great, but was not too thrilled with us for putting her on two more planes.  As soon as we got on the flight from DC to Charlotte, she threw up EVERYWHERE.  That was super fun.  Super fun.  We were exhausted, filthy and now covered in baby puke.  Super. Fun.

When we arrived in Louisville, I cried like a baby before we even got off the plane- mostly because I was so thankful that my family was finally about to be together, but there were a few tears that definitely fell out of pure exhaustion and relief that the world’s longest trip was finally over. 

We changed out of our baby puke clothes and began the walk through the airport.  The anticipation was enough to kill me.  As we neared security, we could hear our friends and family and see a few faces straining to see if we were coming.  And then…

THAT WAS A GOOOOOOD DAY!  Holding my girls in my arms at the same time for the first time was a moment I will never ever ever forget.  I remember my exact thought as Payton jumped into my embrace- "Thank you, Jesus.  Thank you, Jesus."  He is just so good.  So very good.  And I am so ridiculously underserving.

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This morning, in the car, I told Payton I needed to listen to some music about Jesus, because I was feeling a bit sad.  She asked “why?” and I explained heavy-heartedly that I was thinking about Addie.  Payton sighed and said, “I miss her, Mommy.  I wish we could have two babies.”  Me too, baby.  Me too. 

His ways are not our ways. I know this.  If they were, we wouldn’t have waited a year for our first referral.  We wouldn’t have lost our Addie.  And then I would never have known this face- this face that I absolutely adore…

I wouldn’t know that wrinkled nose.  I wouldn’t know that funny lambie laugh.  I wouldn’t know her slobbery kisses.  I wouldn’t know those arms that now reach for me to hold her.  I wouldn’t know that hysterical army crawl.  I wouldn’t know that beautiful smile every time I sing “Jesus Loves Me.”  I wouldn’t know her AWESOME dance moves. 

Let me be clear, Ellie did not replace Addie.  Children are not replaceable.  She did however, bring immense joy in our sorrow, and she continues to do so each and every day.  To say we are thankful to have her home is the world’s biggest understatement. 

I’ll update you on life with Ellie Claire and post more pics of our trip and time at home soon.  Thanks so very much to those who have prayed for us and encouraged us in this journey, and a huge “thank you” to the over one hundred people who were at the airport to welcome Ellie home.  I know that one day she will be overwhelmed that that many people were excited to finally meet her.  Please don’t stop the prayers simply because she’ s home.  The adoption is complete in the sense that she is legally ours and finally in our house, but the healing of her little heart has only just begun, and the adventures that come along with adoption are only in the early stages.

 I hope this blog finds you all well!

Blessings!